Tethered
by TriStateCopFan
Summary: Bobby's thoughts and introspection, based on the preveiw clips for Untethered. Part 2 is the Epilogue.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N**: Just some words that have been rattling through my head since seeing the preview clips for next week. Semi-spoiler for Untethered. 

**Tethered**

It was the feeling -the _thing_ I've dreaded my entire life: Wondering if I had finally lost my mind. Once the syringe was removed from my arm, I remember asking myself how -and why-I had let myself get into this situation. But, still, there was no denying my desire to help or my morbid curiosity of experiencing a mind on the edge.

I remember menacing faces contorted with anger; their mouths twisted with evil grins as they spew threats of the infliction of physical pain. I remember the instruments and fists and kicks that delivered on their promises.

I remember the paradox: screams of pain by some, simultaneously being drowned out by the maniacal laughter of others.

I don't know how long I was there. Hours? Days? Weeks? My unconsciousness was consumed by nightmares; my consciousness, warped by delusion.

I remember the hard, cold table. The feeling of chains and straps binding me around my arms, legs, and midsection; trapped like an animal. It was amazing, really, how my body was totally immobilized, yet my brain took me on the wildest trip ever -to places I never dared imagine.

I remember the sound of my own voice. Futile. Crying, begging, pleading for someone to hear me -to help me-to get me out.

And finally when I opened my eyes she was there. The one who has always been there. Her face looked tired. Tawny eyes glistened behind tears as worry gave way to relief. I felt soft, warm lips on my forehead.

"You're safe, Bobby. It's over," she whispered, choking back tears.

"Eames." I was so tired. It was all I could manage to say.

Slipping back into a peaceful sleep, I felt her fingers lace through mine and I squeezed her hand gently. I was back to the safest place I've ever known --tethered to the amazing woman who'd been my anchor for the past seven years.

THE END


	2. Chapter 2

**Tethered: Epilogue**

How nice is would have been if it had, in fact, ended like that. The way it had in my drug-induced, delusional unconsciousness. Her. Holding my hand and anchoring me, as always, in the storm that is my life. Safe. A soft kiss of friendship and reassurance –a reminder that someone cared for me.

Instead, I awoke in a noisy ER with glaring florescent lights that stung my eyes. A moment of panic swept through me as thought I was still strapped to the cold, hard table. I saw an IV feeding into my arm and the panic grew, as I wondered what drug they were forcing into me this time. It took a few seconds before I became cognizant of my surroundings. I realized the bed was softer; people dressed like medical personnel instead of prison guards surrounded me; my arms and legs had mobility.

And then Eames and Captain Ross approached my bedside.

"It's just fluids. You were dehydrated," Eames said, tossing her head in the direction of the IV tree. "You all right?"

I tried to dupe myself into thinking that her professional stoicism was due only to the fact that the Captain was standing right beside her.

After being released from the hospital, the ride back to Manhattan was tense and uncomfortable. Ross sat up front while Eames drove. I stretched across the back seat of the SUV and pretended to be sleeping for most of the trip, just to escape the situation.

The Hearing before the Chief didn't go well. I didn't expect it to. All I could do was tell the truth and explain my reasons –and hope they would understand. Of course, they didn't. _Another crazy stunt by the whack-job Detective_. That's the gossip around City Hall.

Correction: Suspended whack-job Detective. I've been under the Captain's warning and watchful eye for fifteen months now. To tell you the truth, I'm surprised I wasn't suspended sooner.

Years of pent-up frustration and rage at my brother finally came to blows, but I'm sure that the verbal attacks upon one another did more damage than any physical punch ever could. I'm done with him, but I won't give up on my nephew. Not yet.

I almost laughed when Eames told me about Ross and Rodgers. Sure, I've heard all the rumors about Eames and me. But how'd that unlikely duo stay under the radar? Maybe I'll get the Captain tickets to the next concert at Lincoln Center –try to make amends.

I'm glad Eames got by relatively unscathed. At least she didn't get suspended, although a letter of reprimand is being put in her personnel file—her punishment for being a part of my scheme. I'm sorry for that. It's the first time that her association with me has actually tainted her record. Well, in black and white, on paper, that is. Similar to their curiosity about our off-duty relationship, people have been thinking it for years. Ironically prophetic –just a few weeks ago she told me it was "too late."

She told me she'd see me in a week, once my suspension was over. And assuming the Department shrink clears me to return to duty.

So, it had been a delusion—a pleasant dream. There was no kiss. She wasn't holding my hand. It doesn't matter.

What does matter is that she was there.

THE END.


End file.
